How can we help

Warning: Today's blog post is a very sensitive topic for many. I hope all readers understand I am 100% pro choice and respect a person's right to make whatever decision they feel is right for them under their circumstance. I also hope before making any judgements you read the post and understand this is more about a conversation with a teenager and wondering how to help more young girls before we get to this point!




After a conversation with a friend about a young teenage girl going to get an abortion I immediately thought I needed to write a post about the topic. Below is the information I was told as well as questions I have for you MommE's and DaddE's!!!!


This young girl came to the clinic with the thoughts that this would be a simple process in and out. She had a few friends with her and had no clue what would happen next. Testing was done and she thought she was on her way only to be pulled to the side and told she had to immediately go to the hospital. She was asked who was she with and where did she live. She said Brooklyn and her friends. Two nurses then began speaking about her in front of her as if she wasn't there. Discussing the fact that the young girl was 22 weeks pregnant and they were in capable of doing a procedure for her there. One nurse turned and walked away in disgust while the other said well do u have insurance you wont have to tell your mom just go to the hospital (in Washington Heights) because the doc knows people there. There you can have the procedure just don't wait.


The young girl looked scared confused and timid. She just sat there and nodded her head and nibbled her crackers. Another woman a little older asked the girl if she understood what was going on. And asked her if her mom knew she was there. The girl said no. The woman instructed her to ask as many questions as she could and to not leave until she knew everything. She also told her to call her mother. She said no matter how scared she was her mother would be even more scared and confused if she received a phone call about something happening to her child. The girl looked scared but shook her head yes.

My question to all you moms and moms to be is how did we get here. How did we get to a point where children are too scared to talk to us, to scared to tell the truth about the mistakes they have made, so scared that they are now in worse situations then they would have been to begin with. I understand the thought of putting fear into your child so they listen. Parents of color instill this thought into kids from when they are 1 maybe 2 years of age. I mean I get it I have done it to some degree to Jade. I would rather her stop and think about what she is doing in fear of what mommy is gonna say or do then go ahead in life making careless un-thought out decisions. But in no way do I want her to be 16 and 22 weeks pregnant sitting in a clinic scared to death, with some other woman telling her what to do next and where to go.

How do we as moms, as a community, as a race make it better for our young girls and males? How do we teach our young girls that there is birth control and/or condoms? How can we teach them to think for themselves and stop letting these young men determine their future? How can we teach our boys TO WRAP IT UP?! How do we teach them to own up to the mistakes they have made to stand by these girls that they are impregnating? Why was this young girl there with her friends, she didn't get pregnant by them?

So many questions in my mind so much confusion in my heart. I just wonder what we can do to make the future brighter for young African American males and females?

Whats your thoughts? Talk to me people!

It's MommE-Talk!!