Hey Guys,
I hope your holiday season has been filled with joyous days and nights and you have created new memories of you and your little one.
Today though I want to write about moving on. Ironically today I had 2 separate conversations with 2 beautiful black women. Both about letting go and moving on. Both about LOVE and relationships. So today I ask how long do you wait before you let go of the relationship and focus solely on the benefit of the child? How long and under what circumstances do you hold on to LOVE and what is it about that word that makes us women stick around and be used and abused?
I understand that as a mother you want the best for your child and you want them to grow up in a home with both parents but when that obviously is not working whats the best thing to do? I grew up in a home with lots of extended family. My parents separated when I was very young and I don't ever remember living with mommy and daddy. But my mom had the support of her family, my aunts, grandmother, grandfather, family friends were all her support system.
They say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree and I guess they are right. I am living that life right now. 6 months after Jade was born I made the decision to kick Jades dad out. Why would I allow him to stay there and did what he wanted but do nothing for his child. It has been a long and tough road but I like my mom have the help of family and friends and wouldn't trade that in at all for him to still be living with me treating me like crap, stressing me out and not being there for Jade.
So when I hear about other women taking crap much more crap then I ever took I don't understand why. I don't care how much you love him your love wont force him to be a father and it damn sure wont force him to be a partner. What are you teaching your children, that just because they are around you will live in misery and cheat and argue and cry and fight so that you can prove a point and say your mate is still in the picture.
Ladies let 2010 be about bettering you and letting go of the foolish men in your lives. Believe me he will realize what he lost and you will find happiness and LOVE again!
Whats your opinion??? Leave a comment!!
Its MommE-Talk!!
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I think we all could use a lesson in Letting GO. Certain situations are beyond our control. Anything regarding another human being is out of our hands why even bother. As a mom I can imagine it is much harder because of all the messages out there saying two parent home. If it is a destructive non trusting environment it is still no good for your child two people or one. My parents separated at a young age as well and my mother was with a decent man but not a good father or partner he was so detached. She did her best and we are all pretty well balanced but what image do we have about love and relationships. Life is one big challenge. We have to try and be as happy and stress free as possible. If you find yourself looking in the mirror at someone you don't know it is time to get rid of the baggage. 2010 needs to be the year but this very moment can be the start.
ReplyDeleteStaying together for the sake of the child is never good. I explained to my son when his dad and I broke up that we both loved him and it would be unhealthy for him to be raised in a household where his father and mother didn't get along. He has the opportunity now to see positive examples of relationships even though his parents aren't together.
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